Tuesday, December 2, 2008

The Coldest Winter AKA Dartflix Edition #46

From the very first moment I saw the teaser trailer for Twilight way back in the Summer I said to myself "This shit could end up being a huge hit!". With each passing new trailer and the more promo posters I saw, the buzz for the film increased. This was before I even realized that it was an adaptation of a best selling book and that it was directed by on of my favorite directors, Catherine Hardwicke (Thirteen, The Lords Of Dogtown). When the show "True Blood" premiered on HBO and began to gain an audience and the buzz on "Twilight" began reaching a fever pitch I KNEW it would be a hit. When I saw the first week sales numbers for the "Twilight" OST I was completely certain of it.

The weekend of the 21st it opened at $70 million dollars and outdid "Quantum Of Solace" by a considerable margin. I saw it and I learned quite a few things. For one, I had NO idea that vampires were so emo or that they loved baseball. I was also surprised by the ethnic diversity of the student body at Forks (WA) High School as well as the fact that vampires don't burn up in sunlight or that they like swinging around trees like undead tarzans with teenaged girls affixed to their backs.

I also loved how annoyed Bella got at people calling her pretty and how she wasn't at all creeped out by her vampire boyfriend who claims: a) her scent drives him insane and she's his own brand of Heroin b) that he wants to drink her blood more than anything c) he watches her sleep at night d) that he doesn't trust himself around her but he can't stand being away from her. Trust me folks, you haven't lived until you've seen a family of vampires wait for a thunderstorm and then go out deep into the woods to play baseball (?). Oh, I forgot to do something *SPOILERS!!!* LOL

The next week, "Four Christmases" and "Bolt" took the top two spots but "Twilight" made $50 million dollars the next week to bring it's total to $120 million (they'll be a sequel..and soon). The Jason Statham "Transporter" franchise came in at a respectable seventh with $18.2 million as the Thanksgiving/Black Friday weekend gave the box office a huge boost. We'll see what happens in the coming weeks as 2008 draws to a close.

Films I recommend in theaters (12.1.08-12.15.08) or to add to your queue early or for rental from either Netflix or Redbox:

Cadillac Records
Punisher: War Zone
Nobel Son
The Day The Earth Stood Still
Gran Torino
Wanted
The Dark Knight
The Chronicles Of Narnia: Prince Caspian
The X-Files: I Want To Believe
Step Brothers
Frost/Nixon
Anamorph
Man On Wire
The Contract
The Trojan Horse
Saints & Soldiers
Sky Blue
Sam & Dave: The Original Soul Men (music documentary)
Making Of Electric Ladyland (music documentary)
The Best Of Dr. Katz (animated comedy series)
Lost-The Complete Fourth Season
Deadwood: The Complete Series
The Wire-The Complete Series
Rape Of Europa (Collector's Edition)
Assault On Precinct 13 (Restored Collector's Edition)
White Dog-Criterion Edition
60 Minutes:The 44th President And The Next First Family
The Day The Earth Stood Still (Special Edition) [Blu-Ray]
Casablanca (Ultimate Collector's Edition) [Blu-Ray]
La Femme Nikita [Blu-Ray]
The Bone Collector [Blu-Ray]
12 Monkeys [Blu-Ray]
From Dusk Til Dawn [Blu-Ray]
The Messenger: The Story Of Joan Of Arc [Blu-Ray]
I Am Legend (Ultimate Collector's Edition) [Blu-Ray]
Sin City [Blu-Ray]
Children Of Men [Blu-Ray]
Stranger Than Fiction [Blu-Ray]
Day Of The Dead [Blu-Ray]
Paranoid Park [Blu-Ray]
Jet Li's Fearless [Blu-Ray]
Inuyasha Season 6 Box Set (anime)
Dragon GT: Season One (anime)
Code Geass: Season One Vols. 1-4 (anime)
Gunbuster: The Movie (anime)
Diebuster: The Movie (anime)
Twilight
Special
Transporter 3
Australia
Hancock (Unrated Edition)
24: Redemption
Tropic Thunder (Unrated Director's Cut)
Gonzo: The Life & Work Of Hunter S. Thompson
Monty Python Holy Trinity Box Set
Shadow Company (Special Edition)
Role Model
Slumdog Millionaire
Quantum Of Solace
Hellboy II: The Golden Army
Star Wars: The Clone Wars (animated)
Planet B-Boy
Sukiyaki Western Django
Lonely Hearts
What We Do Is Secret
DJ Dusk's Root Down Soundclash
DJ Spooky's Rebirth Of A Nation
Decon presents Fresh Rhymes And Videotape
W.
Sex Drive
Max Payne
The Secret Life Of Bees
What Just Happened
Changeling
Saw V
Passengers
Pride And Glory
Synecdoche, New York
Let The Right One In
Fear(s) Of The Dark
Zack And Miri Make A Porno
The Incredible Hulk
Sold Out: A Threevening With Kevin Smith
Hell Ride
Elite Squad
Nick And Norah's Infinite Playlist
Religulous
Quarantine
Body Of Lies
Rocknrolla
Rachel Getting Married
Flash Of Genius
Ballast
Boy A
The Visitor
Mongol
Appaloosa
Blindness
Miracle At St. Anna
Choke
Eagle Eye
Iron Man
Snow Angels
Bangkok Dangerous
Burn After Reading
Righteous Kill
How To Rob A Bank
Henry Poole Is Here
Traitor
Babylon A.D.
Towel Head
Hamlet 2
Tropic Thunder
Mad Detective (Johnnie To)
Street Kings
Redbelt
Chicago 10
Where In The World Is Osama Bin Laden?
Smart People
The Legend Of The Shadowless Sword
Warlords
Cocaine Cowboys 2-Hustlin' With The Godmother
Doomsday
The Last Minute
Adulthood
Persepolis
Bomb It
Invisible Target
Street Thief
The Last Winter

Dart's Movie Recommendations (I personally cosign all of these joints):

The Dark Knight
Wanted (the graphic novel is 25x better)
The Chronicles Of Narnia: Prince Caspian
The X-Files: I Want To Believe
The Contract
I Am Legend (Ultimate Collector's Edition) [Blu-Ray]
La Femme Nikita [Blu-Ray]
12 Monkeys [Blu-Ray]
Sin City [Blu-Ray]
The Bone Collector [Blu-Ray]
Children Of Men [Blu-Ray]
Stranger Than Fiction [Blu-Ray]
From Dusk Til Dawn [Blu-Ray]

Rent/Watch these movies at your own risk:

Metalocalypse-Season 2-If you ever see me watching this shit then you best believe that the end is near

Home Alone [Blu-Ray]-*Places hands on each cheek* AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!

Bam Margera's Where The F%*$ Is Santa?-Who the f%*$ cares?

Immortal [Blu-Ray]- New title: D.O.A.

Jingle All The Way-*Puts up middle finger*

The Longshots-Perfect title for a film directed by Fred Durst and starring Ice Cube

The X-Files: Fight The Future-Alternate title: Fight Off The Urge To Sleep

Neo Ned-A White Supremacist Neo Nazi skinhead finds love with a Black woman inside an insane asylum....need I say more?

Rim Shop-Have we really finally exhausted every possible stereotypical setting for a low budget Black film? What's next? Chicken Shack!

JCVD: In Hell-If I had to sit and watch a whole reality documentary about Jean Claude Van Damme's failing career I would truly be in hell.


Coming (relatively) Soon To A Theater (or computer) Near You:

One.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

rofl

Yellow Rebel said...

dont watch warzone b...