Wednesday, August 13, 2008

Dart Adams presents That's Kinda Racist © Norbit Part Three

I'm back with yet another edition of my new regular series entitled "That's Kinda Racist" where I use Norbit as a gauge to determine how racist I think something in recent popular culture is or happens to be (as opposed to if it is or not because 'cism is in the eyes of the beholder). There are three different levels of perceived 'cism in my opinion. Here they are below:

I'm not so sure about that © Norbit

This can be construed as racist via a knee jerk reaction or quick glance/once over but you'd be reaching like Reed Richards to call it flat out racist (no Fox News).

That's kinda racist © Norbit

It isn't beyond the realm of possibility that this is either borderline racist or a product of ignorance leading to the perception of 'cism. Whether or not if you get the benefit of the doubt is up to the individual to interpret but now you've made "the list", asshat(s).

That's racist! © Lil' Black Kid

No doubt about it, folks! This is some good ol' down home authentic 'cism you're seeing here. Just like great great great great great grandma used to make! Mmmm! Damn, that's ignorant!

The first item of the day is about the Spanish national basketball team posing for team picture for one of their Olympic sponsors in which they decided it would be humorous to slant their eyes for the photo. The real head scratcher came when an article in the Spanish newspaper El Globo debated whether or not the gesture could be deemed as're fuckin' kidding me, right? The reporter also tried to pass the buck by saying that the British press (!) was trying to sully the reputation of Spain in regards to race relations.

Hey, hold on. Is this the same Spain where that soccer (or football) coach Aragones said those racist ass comments about Thierry Henry of the French national team during a practice/training session to his entire team? Haven't there been other incidents involving racist chants, actions and comments towards Black players on opposing soccer teams (and Blacks that play on Spanish club teams as well)? There have been other isolated incidents that some could construe as racist that occured in other sports as well in Spain so why try to act as if Spain has a spotless record in regards to offensive or racist actions?

I call bullshit on the Spanish national basketball team for doing anything other than taking the L and apologizing. I think that the reporter that wrote that bullshit article needs to be smacked with a spice rack as well. They deserved all of the boos that they got from the Chinese fans in attendance at their game against China. Too bad the Chinese squad couldn't have kicked their asses (or the fans for that matter). *Picks up a copy of the last Resident Evil game*

In regards to the usage of Blackface as a comedic device in this summer's new super offensive flick "Tropic Thunder" I ain't mad at it (in theory). They explain in detail that Robert Downey Jr.'s character is regarded as one of the greatest actors of his era and he decides to tackle the toughest role of his career...playing a Black man and pulling it off "convincingly". In order to do so, he completely immerses himself into his character, including turning himself "Black".

In satirical humor you need to take things to extremes to make your point (For instance, "Coon Skin" or "Bamboozled"). This is why Brandon T. Jackson's character be the voice of Black folks that would be like "What the fuck?" to the whole situation. I haven't seen the film (and I don't plan to if you wanna know the truth) but I do know that the movie goes in and damn near everyone and everything (hence the boycotts and picketing and general outrage) so I think it's a reach to say this is racist. I did enjoy reading Mo's take on the whole issue over at her blog (it's back!), though.

Country music star and All World redneck Toby Keith is currently touring the nation (I dare him to show up here) promoting his new pro lynching song "Beer For My Horses" . Keith sings about a kinder, gentler time back in the days when if bad guys (read: Niggers, Mexicans and Jews) were running around out of control committing crimes (allegedly) then folks would posse up, hunt the bad guys down and administer some Good 'Ol Boy Southern Fried Justice in the form of a hanging sans a trial (cuz they were obviously guilty, duh!). He was even on The Colbert Report where he performed said song live. But wait, that's not all!

Toby Keith also had some head scratching remarks about Barack Obama (whom Dart Adams and Poisonous Paragraphs endorse for President in '08). He assumed (what do they say about doing that?) that Black people pull for Obama because he's Black but, and I quote "I think the black people would say he [Obama] don't talk, act or carry himself as a black person." You can't be serious, Toby? Oh really are!

This reminds me of those folks that said that "The Cosby Show" was unrealistic because there were no homes where a Black man was a doctor and his Black wife was a lawyer back in 1984. I knew that was bullshit because I had relatives in Mount Vernon, NY and Atlanta, GA that fit that bill. To rednecks, hillbillies and other ig'nant folks in general Toby's just telling it like it is.

Needless to say, Toby is SO ignorant and clueless (nah, he just REALLY loves America!*) that he seems like a Saturday Night Live or Mad TV sketch come to life right before our very eyes. If it was just one incident and not two together in such a short time I could've written it off but I ain't lettin' this one slide. Fuck all that. How in the hell does Toby Keith of all people know how all Black people think? Shit, I've been actively Black for 33 years (come Sunday) and I haven't got a goddamn clue myself!

I saw this link to a Gizmodo feature on Oh about rappers hating on the iPhone on this year's Rock The Bells Tour and myself being an Apple fanboy (word to my brand new PowerBook G4 with the 17" screen) I decided to click on the link and see the video. I did have some apprehension about what ignorant remarks I'd see in the comments box below it whenever anything Hip Hop related is posted on a tech blog. Geeks and Techies are nowhere as enlightened as you might think.

Just as I'd suspected, there were several comments ranging from the borderline racist and slightly ignorant to all out ignorant and flat out racist. Since I'm not a registered user of Gizmodo (and they seem to have no mods whatsoever) I decided to submit the following comment via e-mail to show my displeasure with many of these commenters:

Judging by some of the ignorant, borderline racist and just plain inane comments I've read here this was obviously posted in the wrong forum. There's a thin line between "funny" and "I'm an ignorant asshole and possibly even a racist" and several of you crossed that line today.

Dart Adams


Although I posted this comment back when there were still 80+ comments made (and it closed at 130 total comments) my comment wasn't accepted by Gizmodo (however, all of the questionable ones were still allowed). I got the e-mail to verify my post so I know they got it which makes Gizmodo hypocrites in my eyes since they clearly closed the comments several hours later that evening (I made my comment that morning!). Since no one decided to step in and mod that post and few posters even called out the others for their insensitive and narrow minded comments (but what did you really expect?). I go with the old standby:

See ya next time for another jaw dropping, forehead smacking and vomit inducing edition of "That's Kinda Racist". Bye, kids!

* Denotes implied sarcasm



Anonymous said...

I don't think the Tropic Thunder thing is all that offensive. I'm more offended by these negro's that get on these horrible "reality" TV shows like "From G's to Gents" "I Love Money" "Flavor of Love", etc...That basically utilize bad stereotypes and pass them off as reality, ignorant people watch these shows and believe these stereotypes are real.

Anonymous said...

Spanish sport has some real problems with racism. When I saw Real Madrid play, some of their supporters thought it was OK to bust out a confederate flag in the middle of the game (the opposition team had a number of black players) which no-one else seemed to think was kind of inappropriate.

That Toby Keith stuff is probably the most clear-cut case of racism I've heard in a minute, there is no way to defend those kind of statements.

Anonymous said...


You went in! Soccer will ALWAYS be racist. They don't like kneegrows for anything else besides doing physical labor...and that includes handling a ball. The United States of Amerikkka is no different. It's a federal law to do certain things here, but besides that, nothing really seperates Inter'l commentators from nat'l commentators and journalists on the lines of racism.

The only way racism will be out right unhumane would be if some kneegrow, asian, east indian, west indian, south american would crack the funniest joke about the white in the most offensive manner possible. I mean ruthless.

It's easy to crack on blacks:
how do you stop a black kind from jumping on the bed? attach velcro to the ceiling.

what can a pizza pie do that a black man can't do? feed a family of four.

or homosexuals:
how do you seat four "f*gs" in one seat? turn the bar stool up side down

or spanish:
what do you call a spanish girl who turns 16? Mommy.

i can go on for days... but there's no definitive joke that pisses off the white like they get at us. and when i say the white, i mean anyone of white pale skin from any country: australia, england, scottland, amerikkka...

Anonymous said...

whoa... double comment.

those iPhone comments are BANANAS. i'm not even half way down.. i'm probably at 25% and I'm already offended. I don't even want to read the rest.

lots of sites that are mostly commented by the white or "anonymous" posters posing as white do that ALL THE TIME. the drop the N word like we were back in mississippi woods.