Where Mediocre Happens AKA Dartflix Edition #56

As I predicted about a month ago, the new clusterfuck of a film "X-Men Origins: Wolverine" did extremely well at the box office by raking in $85 million dollars at the US box office and beating it's closest competition by $70 million dollars ("Ghosts Of Girlfriend's Past"). Sure, Fox Searchlight estimated that between 100-150K users downloaded the leaked workprint and millions saw it that still didn't affect the overall performance of the film. It did fall short of numbers put up by last year's blockbuster "Iron Man" but big deal. The main difference was that "Iron Man" was great and "X-Men Origins: Wolverine" sucked in every way imaginable.


This Friday, J.J. Abrams "Star Trek" reboot seeks to knock Wolvie out of the top spot and win over both diehard Trekkies (I'm not one of 'em) and satisfy casual fans of the series and it's many incarnations (I'm somewhere in there). Hopefully he can find a happy medium in translating a franchise with a long and distinguished history plus rabid fans...Lord knows the makers of "X-Men Origins: Wolverine" failed miserably and doing so. Enough of this shit, let's get to the recommendations, shall we?


Films I recommend in theaters (5.1.09-5.15.09) or to add to your queue early or for rental from either Netflix or Redbox:

Star Trek
The Brothers Bloom
Angels & Demons
Next Day Air
The Limits Of Control
The Curious Case Of Benjamin Button (2 Disc Edition)
Twilight
Incendiary
Taken (2 Disc Extended Edition)
Underworld: Rise Of The Lycans
Wendy And Lucy
S. Darko: A Donnie Darko Tale
Geisha Assassin
Under The Bombs
Lying
Nenette & Boni
Holy Flame Of The Martial World
Ip Man [Blu-Ray]
Red Cliff II [Blu-Ray]
The Good, The Bad And The Ugly [Blu-Ray]
Fargo [Blu-Ray]
Ferris Bueller's Day Off [Blu-Ray]
Dog Soldiers [Blu-Ray]
Dexter: The Complete Second Season [Blu-Ray]
Gavin And Stacey: Season One (series)
Penn & Teller: Bullshit!: Complete Sixth Season (series)
Two And A Half Men: The Complete Fifth Season (series)
Wolf's Rain-Perfect Collection (anime)
Gurren Lagann, Pt. 3 (anime)
Darker Than Black : Volume Four (anime)
Gigantor: The Collection, Vol. 1 (anime)
Ghost Slayers Ayashi, Pt. 2 (anime)
Bleach 16 (anime)
Murder Princess: The Complete Series (anime)
Ninja Resurrection (anime)
Blood Reign (anime)
Gilgamesh: Complete Collection (anime)
Seth MacFarlane's Cavalcade Of Cartoon Comedy: Uncensored! (animated)
The Spectacular Spider-Man, Vol. 1 (animated)
Legend Of The Yardbirds: 1964-1968 (music documentary)
Kill The Record Labels (music documentary)
Capturing Reality: The Art Of Documentary (documentary)
State Of Play
Sleep Dealer
American Violet
The Soloist
Tyson
Lymelife
The Informers
Caprica
The Wrestler
Frost/Nixon
Martyrs (Unrated)
As The Technics Spin (music documentary)
Fast & Furious
Observe And Report
Adventureland
The Escapist
Gigantic
Duplicity
I Love You, Man
Quantum Of Solace
Slumdog Millionaire
Seven Pounds
Watchmen: Tales Of The Black Freighter & Under The Hood
Elegy
Special
Timecrimes
Watchmen
Tokyo!
The Horsemen
Watchmen: The Complete Motion Comic
Battle In Seattle
Cadillac Records
Rachel Getting Married
Milk
Sunshine Cleaning
50 Dead Men Walking
Transporter 3
B13: Ultimatum
Synecdoche, New York
Let The Right One In
Quarantine
Changeling
Religulous
Choke
Body Of Lies
Flash Of Genius
Sex Drive
Protege
The International
Friday The 13th
Gomorrah
Zach And Miri Make A Porno
Nick & Norah's Infinite Playlist
Afro Samurai: Resurrection-Director's Cut
W.
Blindness
Chocolate
A Good Day To Be Black & Sexy
Killshot
Taken
The Class
RocknRolla
Henry Poole Is Here
Defiance
Appaloosa
Valkyrie
Revolutionary Road
Waltz With Bashir
Burn After Reading
Towel Head
Baby
Gonzo: The Life & Work Of Hunter S. Thompson
Planet B-Boy
Sukiyaki Western Django
DJ Dusk's Root Down Soundclash
DJ Spooky's Rebirth Of A Nation
Decon presents Fresh Rhymes And Videotape
Fear(s) Of The Dark
Sold Out: A Threevening With Kevin Smith
Hell Ride
Elite Squad
Ballast
Boy A

Dart's Movie Recommendations (I personally cosign all of these joints):

Star Trek
The Brothers Bloom
The Limits Of Control
The Curious Case Of Benjamin Button (2 Disc Edition)
Incendiary
Taken (2 Disc Extended Edition)
Underworld: Rise Of The Lycans
Ip Man [Blu-Ray]
Red Cliff II [Blu-Ray]
The Good, The Bad And The Ugly [Blu-Ray]
Fargo [Blu-Ray]
Ferris Bueller's Day Off [Blu-Ray]
Dog Soldiers [Blu-Ray]
Dexter: The Complete Second Season [Blu-Ray]
Seth MacFarlane's Cavalcade Of Cartoon Comedy: Uncensored! (animated)


Rent/Watch these movies at your own risk:

X-Men Origins: Wolverine: This movie was gheyer than 6 dudes blowing 9 dudes dressed like Liberace with Luther Vandross playing in the background

Ghosts Of Girlfriend's Past: *Puts lamb's blood on door & door knob* This shit looks like it'll be worse than the Swine Flu

Chadni Chowk To China: Sure, it's made a lot of money worldwide...but so did Mr. Bean and Yahoo Serious. (Who?)


Coming (relatively) Soon To A Theater (or computer) Near You:


One.